It will be all right
Why is it that I feel compelled to try to make everyone feel better? This holds true in every area of my life, whether something as small as a disagreement between my DH and son (going on right now, nothing big though), my friends' problems, disagreements between people at work, school, friends, whatever. As one of those personality quizzes (from a previous blog entry) said, I am a peacemaker--sometimes it's a good thing but other times it's not.
Why can't I let these things go? I'm sitting here in the den listening to my husband get irritated, which upsets my son, which gets Dave more upset, and on and on and on. My first instinct is to go in there and make things right, but is that the best thing to do? This is just one of those little things that parenthood is made up of--it's not a big issue at all. Isn't it better to let them figure it out?
But that's what I do. I can't stand to see the people I love upset, in pain or angry with each other. If possible I will try to negotiate between the parties, if not then I will listen and talk to whichever party I'm with (sometimes until I'm blue in the face) to try to make them feel better. But they probably just wish I'd shut up most of the time ;). There are times when I mostly listen and just voice a few thoughts, but I know there have been lots of times when I've said way more than I should have. I can be (and try very hard to be) diplomatic, but sometimes I speak before I think and that isn't always the most helpful tack.
No matter whether I talk or listen or what have you, I worry about the situation until it gets resolved. Sometimes it doesn't get resolved which causes me to worry more. One of my friends has told me not to worry--the only person responsible for him is himself. But what kind of friend would I be if I didn't worry? Isn't that what you do when you love someone?
This entry asks a lot of rhetorical questions with few if any answers. I've been struggling with this for a while now and I guess I just needed to put it down in writing. Maybe someday I'll find the answers to help myself and my friends/family, in the meantime I'll just have to hope that they know whatever I do is out of love.
Currently working on: Blackwork RR, Brendan's Superhero Mini RR, Home, Golden Pavillion, Secret Flower Bed
Why can't I let these things go? I'm sitting here in the den listening to my husband get irritated, which upsets my son, which gets Dave more upset, and on and on and on. My first instinct is to go in there and make things right, but is that the best thing to do? This is just one of those little things that parenthood is made up of--it's not a big issue at all. Isn't it better to let them figure it out?
But that's what I do. I can't stand to see the people I love upset, in pain or angry with each other. If possible I will try to negotiate between the parties, if not then I will listen and talk to whichever party I'm with (sometimes until I'm blue in the face) to try to make them feel better. But they probably just wish I'd shut up most of the time ;). There are times when I mostly listen and just voice a few thoughts, but I know there have been lots of times when I've said way more than I should have. I can be (and try very hard to be) diplomatic, but sometimes I speak before I think and that isn't always the most helpful tack.
No matter whether I talk or listen or what have you, I worry about the situation until it gets resolved. Sometimes it doesn't get resolved which causes me to worry more. One of my friends has told me not to worry--the only person responsible for him is himself. But what kind of friend would I be if I didn't worry? Isn't that what you do when you love someone?
This entry asks a lot of rhetorical questions with few if any answers. I've been struggling with this for a while now and I guess I just needed to put it down in writing. Maybe someday I'll find the answers to help myself and my friends/family, in the meantime I'll just have to hope that they know whatever I do is out of love.
Currently working on: Blackwork RR, Brendan's Superhero Mini RR, Home, Golden Pavillion, Secret Flower Bed
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Well Holly. When you figure it out, will you PLEASE let me know? I am so very much like you.
I'm totally the same way! My DH says I should just let it go all the time but nooooo... I couldn't possibly do that now can I? LOL! Good luck!
By 
, at 6:19 PM
, at 6:19 PM
